CreamFilled Doughnuts: The Wrong History
by Spotty1006
Summary: Ryou wrote a report for history class on the history of doughnuts. Only problem? He forgot to look anything up. One-shot.


**I was going to write a one-shot for Labor Day. Based on what we did for Labor Day. But after realizing that all I got was my 'buying the word so' joke, (Don't ask) it had nothing good in it. Nothing is appealing about shopping (in my book anyway) so I scratched it.  
Then, looking at our Dunkin' Doughnuts calender (Sadly, this is our primary calender), I learned that the fourteenth of Saturday is National Cream Filled Doughnut day. (I do not lie.) So I decided to celebrate that instead. By writing about it 8 days or so in advance. **

**WARNING: The report given in this one-shot about the history of doughnuts is false. NOTHING INSIDE IT IS TRUE (I think, I'm not looking this up.) AND IT IS ALL A LIE! EVEN THE CAKE. But seriously, guys, if you ever have to write a report on the history of doughnuts, only use this as a reference of what is wrong if you want to use it at all. I did not look anything up, I have no intention of making anything correct.  
EDIT: I lie. I looked up people's names. But I just did random articles until I got people. I do not own these people.  
DISCLAIMER: You know what I don't own. If I do not not own it, I probably own it. If I do not not not own it, I probably don't own it.

* * *

**Ryou walked into class with his report, feeling confident. He had written the report on this history of doughnuts to celebrate the upcoming National Cream-Filled Doughnut day (in America). Confident that at least someone might enjoy his report, Ryou sat down and waited for class to begin.

"As you all know, your big assignment is due today," the random teacher began as soon as the bell rang. Then someone walked in late. "What are you doing here?"

"I walked in two seconds late," the random kid pointed out. "Give me a break."

"I'll give you a break when I get a Kit-Kat bar," the teacher retorted. "Sit down in the back of the classroom."

"Yes, sir/ma'am," the random kid muttered as he sat down.*

"AS I WAS SAYING, today everyone's big assignment is due. Who'd like to read theirs out loud first?" the random teacher asked.

* * *

And that's how Ryou found himself listening to Tristan give a four hour speech on flowers. Yes. FLOWERS.** It would have gone on for another four hours when the random teacher interrupted Tristan at the mid-way point. "Okay, Tristan, that's enough."

"But I was just getting to the good part!" Tristan protested.

The random teacher shook his/her head. "No, that's quite enough. Who'll go next?"

Joey went next. "I wrote about dogs," Joey told the class.

Everyone groaned.

* * *

As Ryou listened to kids give their reports, he couldn't help noticing something. Something that set their reports apart from his. He hadn't really focused on the facts at all, only on making it a fun report that someone would at least slightly enjoy. Everyone else focused only on the facts, making this really boring.

Then again, this described history perfectly. And this did seem to be History class.

_Nothing in my report is true_, Ryou noticed as he quickly flipped through it. _I must have forgotten to look things up. Maybe I can just not read it in front of the class. Maybe I can get a D minus for creativity. Or I could run away. Say I'm going to the bathroom and skip town, go to a new school under a new name. Hmm..._

_You know that wouldn't work_, the voice that randomly appeared in the back of Ryou's mind told him. _Besides, what's the worst that happens? You get a failing grade._

_Yeah, right_, Ryou thought as the teacher called his name.

"Ryou? Why don't you read your report right now?" the random teacher asked.

Silently, Ryou stood up and walked to the front of the room, facing the class with his report in his hands. Public speaking, even in front of peers, was nerve-wracking enough without knowing that you're about to fail. Clearing his mind, Ryou began to read out loud.

"Many years ago, around 20 AD, the cavemen discovered wheat. And soon after that, they created the doughnut. And this is the beginning of the legend of the doughnut.

"For a thousand years, people of all ages, sizes, and backgrounds enjoyed doughnuts. Doughnuts were great breakfast food then, and still are today. However, in 1920, this wasn't enough for Teddy Afro.*** He was tired of the plain doughnut, and in 1927, he created the frosted doughnut."

"Who's Teddy Afro?" a different random kid asked.

"A popular Ethopian singer," Ryou said quickly, making it up on the spot.**** "Anyway, after Teddy Afro's death*****, Harihara the first, the king of Laos in the 1940s******, decided he wanted to also make a great contribution to the history of doughnuts. Two years later, he found a way to make doughnuts chocolate.

"People were satisfied with this until about 1976. Around this time, a man who liked doughnuts a lot wanted to start a band. Now known as Lord of Doughnuts, he wanted to make music about doughnuts and other pastries. The rest of his band, Dr. Pastry, Cake Master, and Jack of Cupcakes, formed the band 'The Doctor Pastries' which was named after their drummer Dr. Pastry. One of their hit singles, 'Do you Want Cream with That, Ma'am' inspired Nichola Marschall******* to create the most delicious kind of cream. Instead, he came up with the cream-filled doughnut on September 14th, 1985. And to this day, we celebrate the coming of the cream-filled doughnut. Today, doughnuts are all kinds of different flavors, with various frostings and sometimes cream-filled. Who knows, soon we might invent a musical doughnut. And this concludes my report on the history of the doughnut, a positive impact on the world today. Thank you."

The random teacher clapped. "Good job!"

"Huh?" Ryou was confused.

"My personal goal for this assignment all these years was not only to subject you all to numerous hours of research, but to find someone who would do this assignment without looking anything up. With your very false information, you're the lucky winner."

"That makes no sense," Ryou commented. "However, I cannot really complain. Do I get a prize?"

"Of course!" the random teacher assured him. "Instead of failing miserably like you probably thought you would-" here Ryou laughed nervously, "-I will raise your grade on this report from an F to a D."

"That's great," Ryou replied. "Can I sit down now?"

"Sure, whatever." the random teacher just shrugged.

Ryou then sat down in his seat. He didn't even wonder why no one else seemed to care. After all, everyone else had fallen asleep at his horrible excuse for creative writing.

* * *

***I was too lazy to give the teacher a gender.  
** I do like flowers.  
***I do not own Teddy Afro.  
****Apparently he really is a popular Ethopian singer.**  
******* Teddy Afro is not really dead.  
******Hariha the first was never the king of Laos. He was a real person. I cannot remember what he did.  
*******Nichola Marschall did not do this. He created the Confederate flag. Apparently.

* * *

**

**I only looked up the names of random people who have nothing to do with doughnuts. Actually, I never knew any of these people existed until now.**  
**Happy Cream-Filled Doughnut day (in 7 days)!**  
**Getting a D instead of an F for a smart person like Ryou is like getting 10 cents in the lottery.**********

********** I do not own Calvin and Hobbes. While I'm at it, there were a couple of Spongebob references. I do not own Spongebob.**


End file.
